The Sex Carnival

It isn't every day that I come across blogs even anywhere close to being similar to mine. Frankly, the ones that draw the most attention and are capable of becoming the most popular are the ones which serve to tell rather than discuss, review rather than analyze, entertain rather than inform, hence the popularity of gossip and beauty blogs. Granted, I'm sure most people find sex to be much more entertaining than the current activities of celebrities or the newest makeup trend, but that simply doesn't translate over to blogs.

Maybe it's because there's not too many new things to learn about sex; maybe sex is too much of a taboo topic for the general public I mean, I have to admit that I probably wouldn't visit a site on sex every day. Can you imagine how awkward that would be if a co-worker glanced over and I was casually scrolling down a site filled with not pictures of Kim Kardashian out and about, but instead with all kinds of NSFW images? Actually, now that I think about it, half the things that Kim K wears can probably be categorized as borderline NSFW, but that's besides the point.

Imagine my surprise when I came across a blogger who seemed to be just as interested in the workings of the sex industry as I am. The Sex Carnival touches on prostitution as I do, but doesn't discuss sex workers as much as she profiles them by shamelessly plastering escorts and porn stars all over the side of her blog (I bet if you hadn't yet clicked on the blog, you will now just to see those pictures). Rather than simply profiling the sex workers, I intend to instead discuss their motivations and methods, and I think this particular blog would definitely help to remind me of all the different aspects of the sex industry beyond just prostitutes.

The blogger, Viviane Tang, appears to have had that blog for several years, and in that amount of time, she's amassed a massive amount of posts on the industry, especially since she posts every week or so. She states that she writes for her friends, most of whom are "sex geeks" and "tech tops", but she appears to be reaching more than just her friends, considering that her blog was one of a few to have received an award from CineKink. Many in the sex world recognize Tang for her celebration and encouragement of sex positive culture, as apparent by her endless links to erotica literature and events which teach readers and attendees to embrace and be more open with their sexuality. I almost can't believe there are so many events on sexuality, but then I remember the time I worked at a Hilton and saw a woman in full-on leather gear walking a man who had an apple in his mouth and a spiked collar around his neck through the lobby during a week-long dominatrix conference at the hotel.

Tang's posts are not as detailed as I would like them to be, but then again, as I mentioned, I wouldn't go too in-depth either if I was writing every week for more than five years. She mostly links to book or movie launches, film festivals, release parties, and interactive workshops, then provides a little bit of commentary at the very end. In that sense, her writing isn't so much scholarly or academic as it is professional and straightforward, since she seeks to inform her readers about the events taking place within the sex industry rather than discussing or analyzing the industry itself.

I know if I was a bored housewife who wanted to let out the freak in me every now and then, I would definitely follow Tang's blog, and I think that's who Tang primarily targets with her posts. Her blog is directed at the woman who wants to explore her sexuality and allow herself to fantasize a bit, all the while having a significant amount of free time to indulge in erotica media and attend different events. Who better than a housewife in that case? I'm sure we've all seen just how much middle-aged women's hormones can rage in a couple episodes of Desperate Housewives and Bravo's Real Housewives, and believe me, they could use something like The Sex Carnival to settle them down a bit.

The Money-Hungry Pro

At the end of the day, money is the main incentive for prostitution. Sexual curiosity has been shown to be a motivation as well, but keep in mind that those who are mostly seeking to fulfill their fantasies still charge for their services. Even if some factor other than money is the primary reason for why one might choose to engage in sex work, everyone can be in agreement that extra cash is always a nice little bonus. Let's face it: if we were Suzy Favor-Hamilton and were having sex with strangers to satisfy our desires, we'd charge $600 an hour too even though we didn't need the money whatsoever. I mean, why not? It wouldn't hurt.

Actually, money-hungry pros, who sell their bodies even though they do not need the money, significantly contribute to the prostitution industry's negative image. Although sex work is looked down upon in general, there are some instances in which prostitution is deemed relatively acceptable to most. These include prostituting to feed one's children, keep up with rent and bills, and pay for school tuition. On the other hand, prostituting for a disposable income to afford unnecessary items such as brand-name clothing and luxury goods are especially looked down upon.

I recently conducted a survey which asked participants to rank the following statements from most acceptable/justifiable to least acceptable/justifiable:

Respondents largely and consistently indicated that the least acceptable/justifiable reasons for having sex for money are fulfilling a drug habit (which will be touched upon in a future post) and having luxury items. Why is this the case when most people want luxury things such as expensive clothing and nice vacations in their own lives? I know I would go crazy for Louis Vuitton and Christian Louboutin, if only I could afford it. Why knock the money-hungry pros for pursuing the same kind of lifestyle?

This is due to the fact that people can only feel for those who have sex for money because their backs are against the wall. Prostitution is considered to be an extreme means to an end; it is a job that most people would not want to take part in unless they absolutely have to, such as when they have an obligation to support their family but cannot make enough money to feed their children by working a regular job. In the same survey, I asked participants to state the one single reason that would cause them to begin exchanging their bodies for money. All but one responded that they would only become prostitutes if they did not have enough money to feed their kids or if they suddenly became homeless. 

People are primed to do whatever it takes to satisfy their basic needs, which include food and shelter. Thus, when individuals choose to engage in something so extreme and taboo like prostitution so that they can buy expensive items rather than to simply obtain the minimum resources required for their survival, society immediately chastises them for unnecessary overconsumption. And who can blame society for doing so? While the rest of us sink ourselves in debt pursuing an education to find us a six-figure career so we can finally buy those luxury items and go on those fancy vacations, money-hungry pros will have retired already, having put in only a few years of work, albeit not-so-fun-and-a-little-bit-degrading work, for that lifetime supply of Louboutins.